The power of the introverts

As someone who considers themselves an introvert, I do still sometimes struggle with how that impacts my life, relationships and friendships. 

I am the sort of person who loves going for coffee with friends and going out for dinner, but equally is excited to return home and sit on the couch with my boyfriend, my dog, or by myself. I have rarely felt ‘FOMO’ (Fear Of Missing Out, for the uninformed) as I am often most happy in my own company.

However, my boyfriend, in my eyes, is an extrovert. He draws huge amounts of energy from seeing friends, being out, going to clubs and pubs and meeting new people. I enjoy this too sometimes, but more often than not find myself politely returning to my comfort zone of people, topics and locations. And I feel that this is holding me back somehow. I am not upset by the way that I am, but in some small ways I feel like I am missing out on some integral part of young life. That said, what am I to do when the thought of changing out of my after-work daggy clothes into a sparkly dress and going out on the town makes me feel tired before I even do it? I can also tell that other people are slightly bothered by my behaviour – when out socialising and after a few hours I am ready to go home, or after having several nights out in a row I need a solid week at home to recuperate from it all. I see faces fall when I decline the offer to stay out later, or when people (repeatedly) offer me a drink, and I hate feeling like I am disappointing people, but I don’t know how to alter that aspect of myself, or even if I should?

At what point does an aspect of personality become a symptom of something negative?

Apparently Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera and Emma Watson are all classified as introverts, and apparently 40% of CEOs are also introverts. Perhaps the secret of being an introvert is to channel all that much-craved alone time into a productive outlet, and let that carry you through to success?

I found this webpage listing 30 problems that only introverts will understand. While they don’t all apply to me, I feel that an overwhelming number of them do. I’ve never understood how I can be so introverted, and some other family members so extroverted. It’s odd how it works out that way.

To counteract the aspects of me that would happily sit at home every evening, I schedule things. I join sporting teams, sign up for online study, pre-arrange dinner and coffee dates. The act of scheduling them in allows me some peace that I can work myself up to it, and also ensures that I get some much needed social interaction from time to time.

Still though, something isn’t sitting quite right, and I’m not quite sure how to approach it. Are any of you introverts? How do you engage with your lifestyle, and what sort of activities do you enjoy? Or, do you identify more as an extrovert, who perhaps is in a relationship with, or close friends with an introvert? How are you finding the union of your personality types? Comment below, I’d love to hear about how you all interact!



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